He'll bring religious diversity to the Senate. "I'm the New York Jew who was actually raised in Minnesota," Rabbi Franken avers. The great Jewish poster boy intermarried 25 years ago, although his non-Jewish, non-Jewish educated children "think of themselves as Jewish." He was never bar-mitzvahed and attended Jewish "Saturday school" for approximately two years -- he "hated" it. He doesn't believe in the veracity of the Bible or in Israeli settlements, which he describes as "religious fundamentalism."

Franken doesn't belong in the category of entertainers like George Clooney, Susan Sarandon, Tim Robbins and Barbra Streisand, who use their glamour to forward their political views. Franken is a legitimate politico, a real party hack. The only candidate in recent memory who parallels Angry Al is Arianna Huffington, who used her husband's cash to build up her reputation before running for the carny vote in the California recall election. Franken will get more votes than Arianna -- presumably he and his wife will vote for him -- but he ain't Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Still, Al's my candidate in 2008. All he needs is some catchy material. Slogan suggestions: "Not Quite Norm-Al." "Why Not Me?" "Stuart Saves His Family, But Al Saves Minnesota." "I'll Stand Up for the Smalley Guy." "Help Al Buy New Glasses -- Vote Franken." "I Never Lie, Except When I Feel Like It." "I May Be Ugly, But At Least I'm Not Republican."

It's a pity that Franken didn't gain the popularity he deserved before this presidential cycle. It would have been fun to see him on the same platform as Howard Dean, John Kerry, Richard Gephardt, Joe Lieberman, John Edwards, Wesley Clark, Al Sharpton, Carol Mosely Braun and Dennis Kucinich. His anti-Bush rants would fit in nicely with the other candidates. He could have used Al Gore's old presidential campaign bumper stickers. And Michael Moore would have been the perfect running mate.

For now, we'll have to be satisfied with the prospect of a Coleman vs. Franken matchup in 2008. But don't bet on it. As much as Franken likes to babble, he just isn't willing to risk his image. The truth is, he's not good enough, he's not smart enough, and doggone it, most people don't like him.