Ann Coulter
After a week of prattle about Joe "Conscience of the Party" Lieberman's deep sense of morality, someone in the Democratic Party noticed it might be a tad unseemly to have an opening-night gala at the Democratic National Convention at the Playboy mansion. Taking a page from Lieberman's book, the entire party is now duly "troubled" about the event.

The Playboy fund-raiser was the masterstroke of Loretta Sanchez, California congresswoman and co-chairwoman of the Democratic National Committee -- appointed by Al Gore. The fund-raiser will raise money for her political action committee, Hispanic Unity, and is expected to help Gore with the Puerto Rican wilding vote.

Though the tickets are going for $5,000 apiece, a spokesman for a convention chairman has said they are getting "tons" of ticket requests from Democratic Party bigwigs -- "more requests for tickets than we're going to be able to provide."

At least the Democrats have finally found a role for President Clinton at the convention.

The big question surrounding the event is whether President Clinton will be bringing his chief impeachment strategist, Larry Flynt (Hustler wing of the Democratic Party) to the Playboy fund-raiser. If nothing else, Playboy's largess will likely rule out convention gift bags containing copies of Flynt's landmark woman-being-fed-into-a-meat-grinder issue.

Sadly, the welcoming bunnies idea has not been without its naysayers. Prominent Democrats and Hispanics have criticized Sanchez's decision to hold the Democratic event at the Playboy mansion. And the guy whom the Democrats are supposed to nominate as their presidential candidate later this week, Al Gore, has objected to the Playboy fund-raiser.

Just like he objected to the Clinton administration sending Elian back to Cuba. (Ms. Sanchez has expressed about as much interest in Gore's opinion as President Clinton did.) Worried about losing the bunny vote, at first Gore tried to chart a middle course by simply announcing that he would not attend and stating that he did not "sanction" the event.

A spokesperson for Playboy praised Gore for not saying "horrible things" about the skin magazine -- as she suggested Rep. Patrick J. Kennedy, D-R.I., had done. (Kennedy had sportingly averred that Playboy contradicted the Democratic Party's well-known respect for "the human dignity of every individual." But see Paula, Kathleen, Monica, Gennifer, Juanita, etc., etc.)