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Saturday, February 02, 2008
Robert Knight :: Townhall.com Columnist
The NFL Playoffs: An Affair with Mr. ED
by Robert Knight
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Will the Dems' health care Christmas Present to America be an improvement or detriment to our health care system?


“Daddy, who’s ED?”

“You mean Mr. Ed? He was a talking horse from a 1950s TV show?”

“No, I mean the man who talks about ED. Is he Ed? And what’s e-rectull dys…dys..”

“Ah. Let’s turn the game off for a minute and go help Mom in the kitchen.”

Except that Mom is probably sitting right there in front of the tube, too. Lots of moms watched the NFL playoffs, and a poll by the Coalition for Working Moms found that 80 percent of mothers plan to be watching the Super Bowl on Feb. 3.

The Big Game is a family affair, with literally hundreds of millions of people of all ages watching around the world. Which is why ED’s surprise appearances can be so… embarrassing.

The good news is that other than ED and a couple of other notable exceptions, like the ad for the unrated version of Good Luck Chuck, the NFL has more or less cleaned up its act. During the playoffs this year, sponsors mostly behaved, with few ads that parents would find objectionable. We can partly thank the writers’ strike, since many of the edgy ads in past years during NFL games were promos for edgy TV shows that are now on hold.

But there’s still ED, thanks to Cialis and Levitra ads, which populated the playoffs, sometimes twice a game. Do they really have to go into such detail? Is there a wild-eyed government goon in a raincoat waving fine print at them and ordering them to inform everyone about … well, you know.

Maybe FOX, CBS and NFL executives should try sitting next to a 9-year-old child while the guy explains on screen that men should consult doctors if “an erection lasts more than four hours.”

As for the Super Bowl, although the buzz on Madison Avenue is that the spots will be “nicer” overall than in 2007, parents may want to keep the remote closer than they did during the playoffs. Lingerie hawker Victoria’s Secret, whose store windows in malls have parents walking briskly by while redirecting their children’s attention, has bought a 30-second spot.

Likewise, GoDaddy.com, the Web domain provider with a taste for cheesecake, will be back for Super Bowl XVII. GoDaddy is repeating its ploy of offering an explicit ad to ensure that even Fox will reject it, and then offering a tamer version to drive viewers to the Web site to see the original ad. It’s the TV equivalent of the old publisher’s trick of stamping “Banned in Boston” on the cover of a lurid novel.

GoDaddy has lined up Indy driver Danica Patrick, who leers at the camera while unzipping her leather jacket. This probably won’t cost Miss Patrick a lot of racing fans down at Hooters, but it’s one more reason for parents to be wary.

It’s even got some network folks excited. During a January 24 interview on ABC’s World News with Charles Gibson, ABC ran a 5-second clip of the previous GoDaddy.com girl with her tank top strap falling down in the 2006 Super Bowl ad.

After reporter Bill Wier noted that GoDaddy’s “global market shared increased by 56%” a week after that game, GoDaddy CEO Bob Parsons smugly boasted:

“I knew that's exactly where every male would be looking. And I’ll tell you what, that decision [to run the ad] was as right as rain.”

Right doesn’t have a whole lot to do with it. Just ask Mr. ED.

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About The Author

Robert Knight is a Senior Writer/Correspondent for Coral Ridge Ministries and a Senior Fellow for the American Civil Rights Union.
 
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Mr. Ed
"...Which is why ED’s surprise appearances can be so… embarrassing."

Yes, and it should be. If your pole doesn't work, don't go fishing! It's a waste of time and it annoys the fish.

"...should consult doctors if “an erction lasts more than four hours.”

Or come over to my house. As Mae West said, "A hard man is good to find."



Forget about Bird Flu and HIV/AIDS
The most dangerous pandemic in the world is erectile dysfunction.

As long as the Baby Boomer men continue to age, this will be the dominating fear -- worse than terrorism, worse than nuclear winter or Global Warming (or even worse than four inches of snow in Canada in February!) -- the fear that they could be denied thir inalienable right to instant sex with anything remotely human that might cross their field of vision.

So keep the remote close by and MUTE is your friend, and *Never mind* will do as an answer to what this dreadful scourge entails and whether it will destroy the world.

Caliqua and Audi...
...Thank you very much for the laughs on this Saturday morning!!!!!! You both made my day!!!

I've had this conversation...
--
...with my younger grandkids.

They know I'm a physician (of course), and will ask me questions pertinent to their own and other folks' bodily functions and health concerns.

I've got to deal with my own grown kids' squeaminshnesses (not to mention those of my wife), and here's how I handle questions related to those Cialis and Levitra commercials:

"You know that it takes both a mommy *AND* a daddy to have a baby, right?"

Nods in response. My most recent granddaughter was born only three years ago, and my daughter's pregnancy was plagued by hyperemesis gravidarum. She spent much of it on an IV, and delivery was a godsend. The grandkids are all familiar with pregnancy and how the stork visits a family.

"Well," I continue, "some daddies have a medical problem that makes it very difficult for them to do their part in having babies. These medicines are to help daddies fix that problem."

Sometimes I'll get follow-on questions like: "Did our daddy need these medicines."

My son-in-law will blush.

"No, your daddy is like most daddies, and doen't have that problem. These medicines are only for a few daddies, who do."

With this, we generally get off the subject (which is now safely "medicalized" and boring).

So much for direct-to-consumer (DTC) advertising for PDE5 inhibitors.

Anybody else think that pharmaceuticals advertising for prescription drugs is a Major Stupid Idea?
--

--

Audi
You paint with a broad brush. But maybe not broad enough. If you looked around at other elements of our culture you might find that sexual insecurities and obsession isn’t entirely in the bailiwick of “Baby Boomer men.” If you examine the other gender you might find insecurities and obsessions manifested in dieting, clothes, make-up, cosmetic surgery; a little tuck here, add a little botox here suck a little lippo there. And if one looks at the young it isn’t hard to find both insecurities and obsessions. It is a culture wide problem not just the moral depravity of “Baby Boomer men.”

Remember when
ED was just for Prostate Cancer victims. Now its for Diabetes and Cholesterol. Coming soon, restless leg syndrome.

ED and other drug commercials
Frankly, I am offended by all advertisements that are for drugs that require a medical prescription. Today, doctors are bombarded with questions from anxious patients about the latest "hot" drug that will cure some "disease" of the moment, while putting the patient at great risk for something serious, including death.

These pharmaceutical companies are just pushing their latest new drug (or just a new drug combination) dupe people into demanding it (known as demand pull marketing). This is their right but it should not be their right to creat artificial demand from the lemming public.

BTW, this comment applies to those offensive ED drugs as well.

Adding insult to injury is that these commercials are shown on TV and played on radio at all hours of the day and night -- regardless of who might be in the audience.

Wise up America -- its time to let those boneheads in Washington know that these predatory practices are not acceptable.

And don't get me started on the advertisements from the compassionate ambulance chasing lawyers.

A User Agrees
I'm a 62 Y/O diabetic who needs a little help. That said I agree, the ads are way over the top. Toned down adds later in the evening that gives web sights where more info can be found would be better.

A agree that we would be better served if big pharma were barred from hyping products on the tube and in print. While I'm on the soap bx they should also limit the traffic in to the Dr.'s office. My doc sees more detail persons than patients.

We have ourselves to blame.
Pharmaceutical ads used to be illegal in this country. Lawyers were also prohibited from advertising.

Somehow, somewhere along the line the big pharmaceuticals and the ad industry bought off enough lawmakers to get this sensible arrangement repealed.

And I don't remember any upswell of indignation among the U.S. population-- a mob of passively self-gratifying couch potatoes who've been dumbed down by the public schools and Madison Avenue.

People who sell Febreze of course love living in a world of "consumers" who would never think of taking soap and a scrub brush to a carpet that stinks-- and believe that solutions to problems come in spray cans. The rest of us have to put up with a world that reeks of chemicals noxious enough to distract the human nose from its natural ability to smell-- and houses that reek of cat urine AND Febreze.

Passive, clueless consumers are unfortunately the same people that make up our so-called electorate-- a far cry from the "vigilant citizenry" called for by our Founding Fathers.

All these complaints about noxious and immoral crap that dominates the marketplace, including the marketplace of ideas-- sidestep the issue that the public demands exactly what is being deplored.

This public needs to be talked into a more sensible mindset, and schooled in its own self-advantage. Admittedly a tall order-- but critique aimed at complaining about obnoxious commercials is little more than preaching to the choir.

LOL at the big governent nanny-staters
LOL at you all asking for more big government in the form of censorship and advertising restrictions.

"But there’s still ED, thanks to Cialis and Levitra ads, which populated the playoffs, sometimes twice a game. Do they really have to go into such detail? Is there a wild-eyed government goon in a raincoat waving fine print at them and ordering them to inform everyone about … well, you know."

Uhhh, yes, there is. That's why they have all the disclaimers. You all who want some big government (television censorship, Internet censorship including poker, etc), you have to accept the rest of it (too much information in the disclaimers). Trust me, they don't air the list of side effects because they want to.
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