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Doesnt Take a Village to Raise a Child!

It does take a father and a mother to raise a child. I can speak with certainty on this subject because since the first grade along with my siblings we were tossed around from one place to another.

There was a lot of uncertainty about the world then and sometimes a lack of self confidence. While growing up, my brothers including myself had all kinds of surrogate fathers and mothers and actually were lucky because both of our grandmothers were strong and had the good since to instill a sort of character into all of us. On the other hand, our grandfather was more like a father and set the example which we would follow years later in finding our manhood. They both had easy going manners and belonged to the Optimist Club which I think was really cool. They were also active in the church.

There is another dimension to this age old problem? Also, my brothers and I were raised to a certain extent by our neighborhood. We always stayed over at friends and even went on trips together. Even the older folks in the community kind of adopted us along the way and always took such great delight in us as we were growing up. If we fell and hurt ourselves there was always a mom in the neighborhood who would pick us up and tend to our tears if our grandmother or grandfather was not around.

So, I guess you could say we had an immediate family and then an extended family of sorts. As we got older our extended family included teachers who understood everything somehow and our church where we would find other sources of I guess you would call them mentors. During my High School years there were circles of friends which had to be tended to like a garden. In other words, you had to pull the weeds out every once in awhile in order to survive if you didnt want to get into trouble...these were the bad influences.

The problem for me and my brothers was that our biological parents had not really grown up themselves. Our dad was a playboy who liked to chase skirts more than be tied down by kids and our mother was so young she didnt know what to do with so many children. Ms Schlafly is right though because it is better to be with both parents than to lose one half of your childhood which could mean the loss of extended families such as cousins and aunts and uncles too.

As for myself, I had it a little harder when I went over to visit my dad. I always got the belt buckle instead of the belt and was immediately put to extensive work either cleaning or doing yardwork because my dad resented the fact that his mother in law...i.e. my grandmother favored me out of all of her grandchildren. So, he took it out on me and still does to this day...but despite the fearfulness at times about being around my dad..I would still recommend it. I really think it made me a lot stronger. The only thing I did resent in later years was being put to work when I got home from high school and on the weekends and not being allowed to do my homework or just play with our school friends because my dad said I needed to quit wasting time and get to work.

Years later when my dad got custody of me and my brothers I sometimes had to sneak around just to get my homework done because I continued to look after his rental properties and cut all the grasses, clean gutters, hang sheet rock and paint.Then just when we thought we could see the light at the end of the tunnel he married our step-mother and kicked each one of us out of the house when we turned 17 seventeen. At the time, it seemed like the whole world was falling apart...but now that I look back on it...I must say, life continued to get easy after all that. Even when I went into the military...that was a piece of cake now that I think about it. When I graduated high school I had perfect attendance for all of the five years I was there because I preferred to go to school and be in school rather than be at home when my dad was there because I knew that once I went home all hell was gonna break lose again. Its hard to believe it but my dad never drank, smoked or even did drugs. If he had I would probably not be writing this today. LOL

I am totally opposed to Gay Marriage and for gays to be allowed to adopt kids because I think that part of growing up is discovering ones manhood and womanhood and in order to do this one needs role models in order to understand what makes a woman a woman and what makes a man a man. If you want to call it socialization then ok.

Understanding that a womans world in turned inward toward the child or toward her work as opposed to a mans world being turned outward towards the hunter or the creator or protector as E. Merril Root would say it what its all about in discovering ones destiny or fulfilling ones destiny.

Lastly, there are Gay men and women who are mostly conservative and who understand everything I have written and why. These are the ones who accept the reality and purpose of the nuclear family which is primarily to insure that our species continues to reproduce after our own kind and populate to earth. They realize that if they are granted special rights then other groups will come along too and demand special rights which will threaten the natural order of Nature which God has left in place in order that humanity will not become extinct. You probably will not hear them voicing these opinions on talk shows like Oprah Winfrey or Jay Leno...but they are there and they respect the Nuclear Family and the reasons Conservatives give for not wanting to allow them Special Right under the Law.