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Monday, February 05, 2007
Paul Greenberg :: Townhall.com Columnist
Down With Self-Esteem
by Paul Greenberg
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Remember self-esteem? It was one of the sillier - and more dangerous - fads in educational circles, which keep going round and round. The theory was that promoting kids' self-esteem was going to convince them they were great. And it just might. But that's no guarantee they are great.

On the contrary, this kind of psychological scam could have the opposite effect. Having been told how well they're doing throughout their well-insulated school years, these kids could be in for the shock of their nice, cushioned lives when they're thrown into the real world. And discover that their education wasn't so great after all. Or that a better word for it might be shoddy. The realization might be so crushing they'd just give up.

Some of us had hoped this fad had come and gone. It had. But now it's come back. Bad ideas apparently never die; they just go underground for a while. There they lurk, like an infection, waiting to crop up again in the strangest places. As in a statement from Arkansas' new governor, Mike Beebe.

Governor Beebe came out against schools' sending reports home about overweight kids lest we hurt their "self-esteem." What kind of a report? It's called a body-mass index, which measures how fat or skinny a kid is-based on factors like height, weight, age and sex.

Why be concerned about kids' weight? Because obesity is a real problem in this country. It saps kids' mental and physical development, and can lead to serious problems down the road-like diabetes, stroke and heart attacks.

Overweight kids are also prime candidates for psychological disorders like anorexia and bulimia. Adolescents are notoriously sensitive about their appearance and their peers' opinion of it. The teasing that fatties get in school can be cruel - and lead them to do dangerous things.

A simple report from school about a child's weight might get parents' attention, or even move them to do something about their kid's dietary habits or lack of exercise. It's worth a try. We check kids' eyesight and hearing, don't we? Why not their physical fitness?

Because we're told it would hurt their self-esteem. Well, some kids have entirely too much self-esteem already. A geometry teacher I once knew had a phrase for it: climbing Fool's Hill. The tumble down can be painful. Are teachers even allowed to say such things any more? Or has it been decided that folk wisdom is psychologically impairing, too?

Some of these kids may be all et up with self-esteem, but they're woefully short on self-respect, which is quite another thing. Self-respect flows from self-discipline and the real achievement it leads to. It doesn't depend on psychological gamesmanship. Continued...

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Self-Esteem Example
A perfect example of the effects of the "self-esteem-based education" is the show American Idol. Here we see people who haven't the slightest bit of talent who, when told they have no talent, freak out. Nobody has ever told them that they are pursuing the wrong line of work. If you really love someone you take them aside and tell them "hey, you've got spinach between your teeth - you need to clean it off."

btw - BMI is for sedentary people - the slightest effort towards athletics blows it out of the water

Are we confusing the means and the end?
When I read what all of you have written, I'm struck by the consistency of concern. I'm also struck by the confusion within the issue.

It isn't the concept of self-esteem that is bad, it's the method used to achieve it or encourage it that is significantly lacking.

To value oneself after recognizing one's strengths and weaknesses is to find peace within and have the emotional/psychological energy to work on improving both. BUT to focus on supposed strengths, or to ignore the weaknesses, is a recipe for the mental illness you all so eloquently wrote about.

Self-esteem is an important aspect of being able to get up and face each day despite the trials and (sometimes) sheer agony in one's life. He who has endured never-ending criticism from a closed-minded or shortsighted boss must have some self-esteem in order to stick it out until something better comes along. But to encourage self-esteem over matters that are truly in need of attention is to encourage denial, justification, and an undercurrent of anxiety. That's the incorrect application that rightfully concerns you all.

I believe we should use language in appropriate ways (and stop getting hung up about "PC") but we should not attack a person. Is the child obese/incompetent in some academic area? If yes, the term applies, so far as it pertains to the condition the child has. But then help the child address the obesity/incompetency in a respectful, encouraging manner. We do no service when we label a person the condition that person may have. His/her body may be obese (and, to most of society, therefore worthless), but the person inside is still valuable. He/she may have autism, Down Syndrome, or Conduct Disorder, but he/she is NOT the disorder, no more than any person is "depression" simply because they experience depression.

So while I agree that the "self-esteem" movement as currently bastardized is creating a huge set of problems, I would appreciate it if we'd focus on the bastardization and not the true concept. Let's work to help all people equally value all others, no matter what their strengths or weaknesses may be.

I know, tall order.
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