A funny thing happened to a pro-illegal immigrant activist this week in Dallas, Texas. The activist, a League of United Latin American Citizens representative named Jesse Diaz, was carjacked.

Obviously there’s nothing funny about someone sticking a gun in another person’s face and stealing his car. This isn’t funny as in hardy-har-har. And everyone is relieved that Mr. Diaz wasn’t hurt by the punk who threatened his life and stole his vehicle in broad daylight.

But the amusing part of this crime is what happened afterward.

It seems that Mr. Diaz is plenty steamed that it took the Dallas Police Department a long time to respond to his repeated 911 calls. He told the local NBC-TV affiliate in Dallas, “I always thought that the police would arrive a lot sooner than the 30 minutes it took them to arrive.”

Internal investigations, numerous press conferences, and the inevitable series of picketers and protesters are certain to follow. It will just be a matter of time before Mr. Diaz tries to convince the world that the Dallas Police Department doesn’t really care about a well-known Hispanic illegal immigrant advocate being robbed at gunpoint.

But his angst is misplaced. After all, the newly-elected mayor of Dallas, Tom Leppert, has promised to open a taxpayer-funded immigration office. According to the Dallas Morning News, this office would help immigrants – both legal and illegal – “assimilate” into the city and North Texas region.

Wow. An office funded by hard-working taxpayers which would teach illegals everything they need to know about assimilation, perhaps like obtaining free health care, snagging a job, or placing their children into Dallas-area public schools.

Maybe this will start a trend all over the country. Cities like Dallas and Los Angeles and New York could open up government offices that will help kidnappers “assimilate” into a nice, productive life. Child rapists could get counseling on where the maximum amount of kids congregates. Burglars could go downtown to the “Burglary Assimilation Office” and find out which homeowners are on their summer vacations.

And the illegal immigration insanity continues.

Before Mr. Diaz gets all worked up in demanding expensive investigations into why it took the police 23 minutes to arrive at his crime scene, I can offer a pretty simple explanation. You see, Dallas has emerged as one of the most dangerous cities in America. And the 800-pound gorilla in the room is the knowledge that much of this crime is being committed by illegal immigrants.

In fact, the brave men and women on the front lines of fighting crime are quite sensitive to the violence and bloodshed that can occur when patrolling the mean streets of Dallas and other major American cities.

On November 12, 2005, a Dallas Police officer named Brian Jackson was gunned down by an illegal named Juan Lizcano who worked as a gardener and had had too much to drink that night. More recently, on September 21, 2006, a Houston cop named Rodney Johnson was killed by another illegal named Juan, a slug named Juan Quintero who had been deported in 1999 for child molestation but managed to sneak back into the United States where he executed Officer Johnson during a traffic stop.

So I think it’s entirely possible that the reason the Dallas Police Department took a bit of time to respond to Jesse Diaz’s 911 calls is that their officers probably had their hands full that day.

And while Latino activists encourage people to break the law in order to get what they want, residency in America, brave men and women of law enforcement are risking their lives – and sometimes, giving them – because we can’t seem to figure out a way to stand up and scream to the highest mountaintops, “WHAT IS IT ABOUT BEING ILLEGAL THAT YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND?”

Many pro-illegal activists like to blame the government and the local police for any effort to arrest and deport illegal immigrants. They like to call cops “racists” and “anti-Hispanic” for trying to enforce the laws of the land and stay alive while doing so.

So I find it deliciously ironic that one of those activists turned to those same police officers when he found himself in trouble.

And despite Mr. Diaz placing four 911 calls to the Dallas Police, they just didn’t arrive quickly enough to suit him, probably because they were off dealing with crime that quite possibly was being committed by illegal immigrants.

Now that’s funny.