A random, wistful comment by one of the nation’s most successful movie comedians helps illuminate the least noted of all the Ten Commandments – and should suggest some worthy New Year’s resolutions for the rest of us.

A December 10th Parade magazine profile of Ben Stiller, the star of the hugely entertaining new comedy “Night at the Museum,” describes the 41-year-old star’s quiet life with his family. “Ben now lives in the Hollywood Hills with his wife, actress Christine Taylor (best known as Marcia in The Brady Bunch movies), their two young children and two dogs,” writes celebrity reporter Robert Masello. “He’s been married for six and a half years and says he can hardly remember the night-owl lifestyle he used to lead. ‘One of my friends will say, ‘Hey, it’s Friday night. What are you doing?’ and I’ll have to stop and think, ‘When was the last time I got excited over a Friday night?’ I asked Christine, and she said that maybe it was in high school.’”

From a Jewish point of view, Stiller’s comment conveys a strange sense of emptiness, a tinge of sadness—since our tradition views Friday night – the Sabbath – as by far the most significant, most “exciting” night of the week. Though he often portrays Jewish characters on screen (even playing a likeable, lovesick rabbi in Leap of Faith), Stiller’s mother (the gifted comedienne Anne Meara) is Irish Catholic and he claims no particular affiliation with the religious tradition of either parent. It’s not surprising that he’d feel no particular compunction to celebrate Friday night as a special occasion with his family, but his implication that weekends at home count as boring and indistinguishable highlights the deeper need for Sabbath commitments.

When it comes to the Ten Commandments, most Americans make some effort to honor most of them – avoiding murder, theft, adultery and false witness wherever possible and even, if they think about, trying to honor parents and to stay away from covetousness. The Sabbath commandment, on the other hand (most often enumerated as number four in the Big Ten) gets scant attention: aside from Seventh Day Adventists, Orthodox Jews and a few other minor denominations, few of us even pause to consider what God expected of us with the instruction “Remember the Sabbath Day to keep it holy” (Exodus, 20:8) or, in the later restatement of the Ten Commandments: “Guard the Sabbath Day to keep it holy” (Deuteronomy 5:12).

According to Jewish tradition, the two imperative verbs “remember” (zachor in Hebrew) and “guard” (shamor) represent the two essential and contrasting aspects of Sabbath observance. “Remember” emphasizes the positive elements of the holy day – setting up a big festive meal with your best food and wine, singing songs, enjoying guests, celebrating your blessings. The instruction to “Guard,” on the other hand, tells us that in addition to these special, additional positive observances, there are also numerous negatives, things we don’t do. A Biblical Sabbath involves not only things we add to our weekday routine, but behaviors we subtract and restrict. We’re expected to cut back on our normal, daily activities – no creative work, no handling of money, no media immersion, no indulging our normal human (and God-given) impulse to alter the world that the Almighty has created (in the first six days) and given to us as a blessing.

The key purpose of both “remembering” and “guarding” (of both positive and negative observances) is to make the Sabbath “holy” –-- to consecrate the day to God, and to set it aside as different from all other days. This goes along with the core meaning of the Hebrew word “kadosh,” as well as the dictionary definitions of its English counterpart, “holy.” The first definition (in the American Heritage Dictionary) says “belonging to, derived from, or associated with a divine power, sacred” and the fourth definition explains “specified or set apart for a religious purpose.”

Leaving aside any religious associations, the idea of one day a week “set apart” for family and friends and home-based festivities makes all the sense in the world. With the frantic schedules we all keep today, time rushes past us in a blur with few guideposts beyond birthdays and anniversaries and the major seasonal holidays. Ben Stiller isn’t the only one who can’t remember the “last time I got excited over a Friday night.” The days melt into one another with little distinction or direction, especially on those not infrequent occasions when weekday stress and demands infect the atmosphere of the weekends. A Sabbath – a day of difference, set aside –breaks the pattern and the pressure and reminds you where you are, in the calendar and in your spiritual progress. One of the big advantages of traditional Sabbath observance is that it forces us to take note of another week that’s passed, and to emphasize the opportunities in the fresh week that’s about to begin.

I can’t claim that every Sabbath counts as memorably “exciting” in the Medved household but you certainly you know it’s different, radically different -- – with white tablecloths, glowing candles, free-flowing wine, leisurely, multi-course meals with abundant guests, and no telephone conversations or e-mail connections or business appointments or trips in cars. Continued...