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Tuesday, April 03, 2007
Lynn O'Shaughnessy :: Townhall.com Columnist
Readers offer their own stories of frugal living
by Lynn O'Shaughnessy
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Recently, I was delighted by the tremendous number of e-mails that I received from readers reacting to my column. Maybe it was my confession that I once couldn't afford a can of grape juice that struck a nerve.

To provide further inspiration for those who need prodding, I'm devoting this column to comments from readers, who are faithfully following the gospel of frugality. Here goes:

Believe it or not, one of the highlights of our family life is our Wednesday sojourn to the thrift shops. I sometimes marvel at the sight of my clothing when I realize that everything I wear on any given day and 90 percent of what I have in my closet is a thrift-shop purchase. Those visits on Wednesdays are not only financially enhancing, but also cathartic in nature." - Tom

I had a conversation with a real estate agent several years ago who told me about a couple (with no children), who each made more than $100,000 and still rented. She was trying to help them buy a place, but they couldn't afford one. They spent everything they made and had no savings or money for a down payment. So no matter what the income, if people haven't learned to live within their means, they will always have a problem! - Sharon, who wrote this e-mail while wearing a Liz Claiborne outfit that she bought for $8 at a thrift store

I saw myself in your column today. I was a yuppie in the '80s, moved to San Diego for my husband's job in the '90s, where we lived on his income and had two kids. I slowly built a consulting business and now we could spend a lot but don't, partly because of those years of frugality. Like you said buying used saves you money, but I think you missed the opportunity to also say that buying used items saves the planet's resources. We buy organic fruit and vegetables through a community-supported agriculture program. For $20, I get a box of food direct from a local farm delivered to a nearby location. The variety and quality are excellent and I know I'm supporting local farmers who don't use chemicals to grow our food." - Anne

About 25 years ago, my husband and I fell on financial hard times due to an injury and unemployment challenges. Necessity being the mother of invention, we learned to live very frugally while certain acquaintances and relatives lived quite high off the hog. Well, things got better for us; we both got decent jobs but continued to live beneath our means.

We are now in our early 60s, retired, enjoying long RV trips in our adequate, used, but unimpressive motor home. We are debt-free and can live comfortably on our pensions and prudent investments in our modest, comfortable, but not too fancy mortgage-free home.

Our relatives and acquaintances (notice I did not say friends), who rubbed our noses in their many fabulous material possessions all these years, have no plans to retire. Both spouses have to work full-time to keep up the payments on their beautiful, newly redecorated homes, furniture, cars, RVs, cruises, wardrobes, vacation homes, etc., etc. I am so glad that we never yielded to the pressure to keep up with the Joneses. - A reader

If you do a sequel, you could consider adding the following: 1. For every purchase, ask if it is a "want" or a "need." 2. Can you live without any of the designated "needs"? 3. Postpone all "want" purchases for 48 hours and then re-evaluate as to their desirability. 4. Create a daily log/diary and record every purchase, no matter how small, for two weeks. 5. Label each purchase with a "W" or a "N" and have a friend/family member evaluate the selections. 6. Total each category of expenditures and multiply by two for a monthly budget. 7. Substitute half of the "wants" spending with deposits into a savings account or investment. I teach these principles to my students to help them combat the Madison Avenue barrage, which we all must endure." - Gary, college economics professor

I also got e-mails from a few readers who expressed frustration that they couldn't find the prepaid phone deal with Verizon Wireless that my family has used for years. Phone plans do change, but there definitely are cheap prepaid plans out there.

Readers told me about the Cingular Go phone and the prepaid plan from Tracfone. Here's the experience of one reader:

"I was provided with a free small flip phone from Cingular, and I pay $25 for three months and 100 minutes with long distance and no roaming. If I renew before the three months is up, the remaining minutes roll over. They have a one-year plan that has even more savings."

One final note: As I was wrapping up this column, my daughter Caitlin, who is a high school senior, called me during lunch to say that her economics teacher had distributed a handout to the class on being frugal. Glancing at the paper, Caitlin was shocked to see that it was a copy of my column. When she blurted out, "That's my mom!" all her classmates suddenly began intently reading the column that they might have otherwise pitched.

Hey, whatever it takes to get the word out about being frugal is A-OK by me.

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About The Author

Lynn O'Shaughnessy is the author of Retirement Bible.

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Granny always said
"Use it up, wear it out, make it do or do without." She reared 8 children during the Great Depression when her husband was not well, and she was a Steel Magnolia of the first degree (Montgomery Alabama) who knew how to extract the last cent out of every opportunity. Mama learned from her. She reared five of us on whatever she had at hand -- and she did it in such a way that we never felt poor. We learned to enjoy what our friends had without envying them, to "window shop" without wanting what we saw, and to look on the Christmas Catalogues as any other book in the house. At one point when Daddy was in the hospital and Mama had three of us to look after and wasn't working, someone suggested she go to the Catholic Charities. Mama said she would stick her head in the oven and turn on the gas first. I remember that particularly.

I grew up to be much less frugal in my thinking, but I still managed to "scratch a living on a rock" as I got out on my own. When I was making $15,500 per year I was travelling regularly to Europe and Australia and paying cash (because those were the days when unmarried Girls couldn't get credit cards). Once I came home from England with 12 cents in my pocket! I was able to do this because Mama taught me that it was the travelling that mattered, the people you saw and the places you visited, not where you slept or what you ate. Because we had more than 30 Aunts and Uncles (Daddy had 11 brothers and sisters, Mama had 7) we slept at their homes when we travelled, on the floor or on mattresses or on the couch or at the foot of our cousins' beds; so i could sleep anywhere when I grew up. We ate what was put before us and said Thank You; so "cuisine" to me was whatever I could afford. I did that for ten years and came out the other end with no debt and some wonderful memories.

Now when I read about how to save money I wonder why those people ever took up those habits in the first place. "Only eat out twice a week?" "Park your car one day a week?" "Only do four loads of laundry a day?"

Wasteful, spendthrift ways to "save money."

But maybe you have to be lucky enough to have a family whose Daddy says "Spend your money on memories. Those they cannot take away." Daddy tells us still about the people he saw in the concentration camps as he helped liberate Germany, people who gambled because they could not bear to leave their belongings and ended up losing them all.

Look around your house and ask yourself what you'd grab if you had to run for your life. Or if you would gamble and burn with your possessions.

The difference is in the definition
I grew up in the excess life - 2 homes, a vacation (month long) every year, new car of my own at 17, private college. Married into it and everything went bad. I found that image is everything, relationships are nothing. So I took the two kids and walked away. Lived on $26.00 (after paying rent and a car - remember women had no credit back then, had to establish ME). We did it with free school lunch, a babysitter who included us in dinner and a good church (who ended up helping me move and with food until the divorce was final and I got MY money back).
Then I married for love. We have been living pay check to pay check. But we have what we need - house, food, a car and healthy children. 4 out of the 6 are in college (1 child and I are not). My husband & I aren't working and we are eeking along until he starts back to work. We grow some of our own fruits and veggies and we have had friends/family give us excess meat (hunters mostly).
We live a 'carbon negative' lifestyle and I suspect when my husband goes back to work this summer - and starts making more then we ever have - we will continue to live the same way. We have what we need and want very little more.

What's the Point?
I am sitting here trying to figure out why this article is on a conservative website since it refutes so much that is dear to the hearts of conservatives. The author states that she and her husband "fell on hard times" due to an injury---this does make one think of the advantages of having good medical insurance, even universal health care, since apparently these folks weren't able to pay out-of-pocket for fee-for-service medicine. Next we have the comment of wardmama reminding us of the good old days (often longed for on this board) when women were kept in their place by having no credit of their own. Then, horror of horrors, her children received a free school lunch.

Much better to stay with the program: 1) A woman should remain in a bad marriage, subservient and unhappy. Make sure that economic policy keeps her there. 2) Anything you can't pay for, you don't get: let the injury go unattended, let the broken bone stay broken, and definitely let those children go without lunch. What are we, Communists?

FRUGAL LIVING BY Lynn O' Shaughnessy
Good Morning,
I read your article with great interest and couldn't agree more.

In my former job I was fortunate enough to take some financial courses offer by the company after working hours. They were taught by a local financial professor. One of the comments he made was echoed by Gary the college economics professor in one of your articles which was "People don't know the difference between their needs and their wants". At first I didn't know what he meant but after awhile I learned. I listen to my children and it is "I need this and I need that". They don't need it they WANT it. I want a Cadillac but what I actually need is a car with 4 wheels to get me from point A to point B. What I can afford is something in between. Thanks for the good job and keep it up.

Joe De Rosa

Lily
The point is that even though these people fell on hard times, they made it through without stealing other people's money (ie. tax supported freebie programs). In the end they gained what those who want endless gov't programs to take care of them don't--character and honor.
Even though our family would have qualified for food stamps during most of the early years of our marriage we never applied for them. Why should other people be forced to pay to feed my family?? We planted a garden to supplement our grocery budget. I got creative with leftovers.During a time when my hubby was laid off my family would often bring a bag of groceries when they visited, but they did that voluntarily to be a blessing to us. Forced gov't charity is no charity at all.

Silly Lily
Poor dear. Never having taken a logic course, she falls back on every fallacy in the book, Ad hominem attacks, Reductio ad absurdum, and the rest.

Lily, my dear, conservatives have one thing in common, I think. We would just as soon not have self-proclaimed 'liberals' like you, living our lives for us, confiscating our earnings, and spending it as you believe we deserve and require. We've looked around and noticed, as the founding fathers warned, the things the government can do better than private enterprise are few.

This article was about frugality. It's possible to live well on rather little, as many of us reviled 'conservatives' learned early in life. It doesn't mean not thoughtfully giving or, if need be, graciously receiving kindness from others. In fact, some of us believe that's part of humanity's essence, the ability to look out for each other. When government mandates take that away from us, we are diminished.

Lily brought up healthcare, a favorite 'liberal' bogeyman. My doctor-spouse used to 'forget' to send a bill when he knew times were tough. It was a respectful, confidential matter entirely between him and his patients. Now the Government, in its all-seeing wisdom, has declared that quiet, private kindness illegal. Now, poor patients must apply, be screened and humiliated, subjected to clerical scrutiny, and every dime confiscated from taxpayers filtered through layers of bureaucrats and paper pushers, eventually to be paid, a much reduced sum, to the physician and his multitude of clerks- when it would have been so much cheaper, simpler, and more decent to have just said, 'Don't worry. Take good care of that little one, and pay me when you can.'

'Liberals' find the idea that somebody might be leaving the government out of some aspect of their lives unacceptable. Isn't that funny? Liberals want total control. The word 'whatever' only applies to matters of faith and morals, and then in a sneering tone of voice.

Appalling that a Conservative would write about frugality, isn't it? It denotes a level of self-control and self-determination unacceptable to 'Liberals,' our intellectual superiors, who wish to bestow the benefit of their collective wisdom on those of us who are too stupid and backward to appreciate it.

eco-conservatives
What Lilly & other liberals forget is that many conservatives are ecological. I ride a bike 10 miles to work, we make our own bread from white winter wheat (makes a nice light loaf)which we grind. I heat the home with wood I cut myself.

But I am in health care and would be horrified if Lilly's theft and redistribution of resources happen. I still quietly provide low-cost services to those who need it but I would be in trouble if the gummint knew.

Conservatives give far more to charity than liberals, give more service to community and church, and are better citizens. Naturally we love this column.

Old doc J

Lilly
What nonsense you write. You obviously do not comprehend what conserve-itives are saying. They conserve, do without luxury, overcome obstacles to take care of themselves. They accept a little help from friends and do not demand the government meet all of their needs. Obviously when someone is in the hospital, they are receiving healthcare and they are paying for it by forgoing wants and taking care of essentials.
They are not saying women should not have credit cards or stay in bad marriages. They are speaking from experience of how they overcame by using their own minds and skills to achieve their goals. Do not believe conservatives are all wealthy and money driven. If I look at the Kennedys, Gores,Clintons, Heinz-Kerrys etc. I could say all liberals are wealthy and money driven. I know this is not true because I use my brain and see many liberals who want more government control of our money to meet their wsnts and needs.

Forced to be frugal
How can we not work to be as frugal as possible when so much of what we earn is taken away by the government before we even see it? I am one of the cursed, the hard working, small business owners of America who works very hard at not spending more than I make. Considering our current tax code, and the wonderful tax increase that our new Congress is trying to sneak past us the closest thing many of us middle income families will get to a vacation is a trip to the grocery store. Frugal a good idea, try a necessity!

Lilly
I think the thing you probably won't "get" is that conservatism honors personal effort, and acknowledges that IT is what makes all the difference.

The vast majority of conservatives are like the ones here, including myself: we grew up poor -- especially by today's standards, but even by those of our childhoods -- and we know that there is no victimization or dishonor in being poor. We know what it's like, as adults, to live poor and not have credit -- that there are upsides as well as down, hope and enjoyment as well as hard work and self-denial; we know what it takes to move beyond that; and that's why we disagree that poverty is imposed on a person by anyone else, and has to be a permanent state unless the government intervenes.

OF COURSE conservatives know and write about spending wisely, buying second-hand, getting along on what you have, recycling, maintenance rather than replacement, making the most of a little. That's what we DO. It's how anyone gradually acquires a middle-class lifestyle, after starting adult life with not much.

Throughout my life, I've known too many people from all walks of life -- ethnic, national, religious -- who have moved from practically nothing into the creditworthy, heavily-insured middle class, to accept the argument that it's somehow just too hard. People are doing it every day, not by cultivating an attitude of economic victimization and getting the government to validate their feelings, but by using it up, wearing it out, making it do, or doing without.

Ripley
Believe it or not, despite my tag I am a great deal like Lynn O'Shaughnessy's readers. Fiscal conservatism is not related to ideology

I live debt free in a mortgage free house. Pardon me for sneering at the "financial planner" who told my wife, "everybody pays rent". The best case scenario for that stupid statement is a reference to property taxes.

I am not disparaging financial planners as a group, but just because they hold a licence, doesn't mean they can come in from the rain.

Some one said, pay cash, make do, or do without. Ditto.

Don't use your credit card unless you can pay it off. Many emergencies are wants elevated to need status.

If you ever pay off your car, continue the car payments to an IRA. Its an easy way to save and don't treat it as found money.

If you are buying your house, upgrade asap to energy efficient items. Your utility bill will thank you forever. In '94 my utilities averaged 250 month. Today, my highest summer usage bill is 150.

Someone else said it and I heartily agree, make a distinction between what you want and what you need.

35 years ago, my brother in law wanted one of the first LED watches on the market. For the privilege of wearing the latest and greatest and basking in the envy of family and friends, he got to spend $400. This has been that family's life style since. I know their credit is squat and they've had at least one foreclosure. I don't know if they will every retire, but they do have some great toys.

To turn you stomaches and assure you I have not converted to the "true way", I'm voting for Hillary.

Taxation for Frugal Living
This may seem off topic but please stick with me.

Our current income tax system punishes hard work and promotes excessive consumption. IMHO the entire taxation system, at the Federal and State levels, should be replaced with a Personal Consumption Tax on all new products and personal services consumed by an individual in private and at work (expenses) paid for by the consumer. A PCT would reward frugality and also reward the purchase of used products (no tax on used goods). A PCT would also be good for the environment because it would promote re-use.

Please look for candidates in your area that support consumption taxes to replace the current taxation system.

Thanx,

Kevin

Taxes and Insurance
Kevin, It is called The Fair Tax and anyone can get more information on it at http://www.fairtax.org.

It is the only way we can get a fair shake and actually be able to save money.

My husband and I are both self employed. Now that we no longer have 5 children at home, we still can not afford to spend much because everything either goes to taxes or insurance premiums... And believe me, when you need the insurance, they do not want to pay anything!!

We have scrimped and saved all of our lives, living frugally and putting away what we could, When my husband fell off a hay trailer, and broke his elbow, insurance only paid half of what it cost to have his elbow repaired. We used over half of our savings to pay our part of it.




Frugal and Proud, Lilly
When I divorced my husband, my water heater, my furnace, my garage, my toilet and my car all decided to break down or implode at that same time.

My money cushion was spent before the ink was dry on the divorce papers. I then lost my job. I was on unemployment for 1 month, and I despised myself. I had every right, and I decided to pay the agency back.

I sold my wedding ring to get by. I got a job within 3 months.

I didn't get myself into credit card debt or take out loans. I paid by check for everything. I paid for only what I needed.

It's been 6 months and I'm still living on Ramen Noodles, but I've upgraded to celery and peanut butter. Yes, I can buy a steak, yes, now I can afford a vacation, but I'm holding back. I refuse to do any luxuries until I get my original money cushion back. That is my goal and I am almost there.

And, I did this all without government hand outs.

Conservative Money Management
I am glad to see columns like this. This is a practical description of how to live a conservative lifestyle. In many ways, it is more useful than the debate over who should be the next president. It is gratifying to see some of our left-wing friends join us in this part of the conservative lifestyle. Interestingly, those of us living frugally are also acheiving left-wing environmental aims.

Good money management (frugality) is a conservative virtue. Those who can do without are so much less likely to need government assistance. In the long run, our businesses and economy would be so much healthier if we would all just live off what we make.

It is so hard to do without, but worthwhile in the long run.

Frugality
Amelia, your response to "Silly Lily" was very artfully crafted. It was thoughtful, concise and a joy to read.
Thanks for your insight.
Gdad

been frugal & determined
I've been pretty frugal in the past. when I ran out of savings for college while enrolled. I reasoned that I could earn enough money to rent an apartment or continue undergraduate studies but not both even with several roommates. My first thought of renting an apt without continuing school was: where will I be in 2yrs with this approach?
So I opted to continue placing virtually all of my earnings towards tuition.
I was ineligible for food stamps because I was a full time student.
after some thought:
I moved into a 10x10 u-lock it warehouse.
I put a tap in the lightbulb socket that had an extension on it . I threw crushed cardboard boxes on the floor for insulation (winter, goergia mountains). I slept on the floor next to my motorcycle and locked the door from the inside.

I always woke early, peeked out the bottom of the door to make sure no one was around and drove out early in the am before the managers arrived.
I took showers in the gymnasium , worked 3 jobs.
One job was working for the college dining hall.
Student workers were billed $2/day for meals if they worked in the dining facility that day. That was great because not only did I get paid but got FOOD as fringe benefit.

After finishing classes, then work I would study/snooze in the library until closing time at midnight.

At midnight I would ride my motorcycle back home(lol) open the door and park it next to my makeshift bed.

On the weekends thur ,fri,sat I worked 3rd shift at a convenience store . So on thursdays I packed fridays clothes, school , work, change clothes hustle back for 8 am class friday, work cafeteria, sleep in lobby, library, convenience store/study back home saturday morning apx 800am.

I did that for basically 2 yrs until graduation (with honors).
I suspect 2yrs in the infantry was good prep for this experience. I was quite happy because , I knew I was doing the right thing. The only drawback was I could never take a date (home).

I've made lots of financial mistakes since then but whenever I think things are tough now, I can vividly remember 20yrs ago and laugh.

I did that at 20 so I won't have to at 80.

yeah occasionally I snicker at people who claim to not have money for college or can't save money while throwing it away to impress the neighbors with bling.

Frugal not the same as cheap
Not that my dad was ever a tightwad, but lots of things he bought cost the least. Clothes, infrequent restaurant meals and especially gasoline—he’d go out of his way to stop for cheap gas regardless of the station’s brand or status.

So on our trips I visited a lot of restrooms that were hardly nicer than the little shack out back.

Dining out always featured the blue plate special and never the steak or even a shake. And of course, as a youngster I never got to see one of his tax returns, which surely must have been quite imaginative.

Besides, aside from having a nice inheritance to thank him for, I agree with old Calvin Coolidge’s assertion that, "There is no dignity quite so impressive, and no independence so important, as living within your means."

Dad certainly did, and his frugality has affected my own adult behavior. My wife and I shop at Wal-Mart. I still buy cheap shoes, reminiscent of those thrifty Thom McAn’s of old.

Frugality is also a major reason I have opposed measures to fight global warming. All of them seem terribly expensive, with not the least assurance of being the least bit effective. As noted climate skeptic Bjorn Lomborg has claimed, choosing the kind of future Al Gore advocates could cost, according to U.N. estimates, $553 trillion over this century—leaving in 2100 the average world inhabitant 30 percent poorer.

Frugality is why I also enjoy living in Virginia, which lately spends too freely, but at least still feels guilty about it. Our taxes are still low and we get a good bang for the buck, excepting of course our roads.

Now here come the Democrats and especially Jim Webb, our new senator so abundantly full of himself, wailing about how unfair it is that we aren’t all rich. If we were, don’t you see, then Congress could get lots more money through income taxes. As it is, nearly half of Americans pay little or no Federal income taxes. Give them more subsidy to make them richer? You betcha.

“The problem with political jokes is that they get elected.” –Will Rogers.

Webb carps about how a few rich CEOs make so much more than the rest of us. Make them all work for free? That wouldn’t cause even a wiggle in the gap between the rich and poor.

One final point: Frugal doesn’t mean cheap. Indeed, it’s claimed that conservative Americans give a lot more to charity and churches than liberals do.

We’re frugal, they’re cheap.


Common Sense at last
I truly enjoyed this column--at last some common sense at Townhall about the realities of frugal living. This is a column my mother, the worlds's most frugal person, could have written. Let's bypass the usual conservative vs liberal nonsense--fiscal responsibility cuts across all political party lines.

I was widowed two years ago and had to make some very drastic alterations which I wasn't too thrilled about. I don't have cable or satellite TV, no cellphone, no car, and I dumped all unnecessary book club, dvd club and cd club subscriptions. They all became alot of bills that I could not afford. Here's a couple of suggestions to enhance frugal living:

Go to the public library. You can rent not only books but also Cds, books on tape, dvds and video tapes (yes, they still have them). Sometimes larger libraries even have free movies and cultural events!

Get a Netflix subscription. For a very modest sum, you can rent the movies you really want to see instead being held hostage to the cable and satellite companies.

I imagine everyone is rethinking their car purchases and driving habits with gas hovering around $3.00 a gallon. What a !

Go to dollar stores whenever possible.

It's very reassuring to know that frugal is no longer a dirty word in this consumer crazy culture of gimme, gimme, gimme--more, more more. Ask yourself--Do I really need this before making any large purchase.

Frugality
Frugal living is all well and good when you HAVE to scale back but to tout it as a way of life seems to me to be the attitude of a loser. In order to really enjoy life, it seems to me that one should aspire to be able to enjoy the best that life has to offer, not be content with hand-me-downs.
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