--Tell the terrorist that Dick Cheney just flew into Pakistan for a little bird hunting.

--Tell the terrorist that Osama bin Laden decided to pack it in, hired the William Morris Agency and plans to host a reality show called "Dancing With the Mullahs."

--Tell him that Osama bin Laden's No. 2, Ayman al-Zawahri, has converted to Judaism.

--Threaten to give him two front-row tickets to a Los Angeles Clippers basketball game.

--Paste on the terrorist's prison cell ceiling a Photoshopped picture of Helen Thomas in a thong bikini.

--Tell him that Cat Stevens has returned to Christianity and that Flavor Flav has become a Muslim.

--Make him sit through an entire Joe Biden speech.

The campaign and election ended. Obama won. He serves as commander in chief in the real world. If a terrorist refuses to divulge information that could save hundreds, thousands, hundreds of thousands of lives, what, pray tell, "other way" does the President envision?