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Saturday, November 18, 2006
Doug Giles :: Townhall.com Columnist
Avoiding the Date from Hell
by Doug Giles
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Before you wade into the dating swamp, make sure you have something going on. Dissuade yourself right now from the debilitating notion that you need a man to be complete. Granted, great guys do add to the mix. That said, it’s incumbent that you first have a life for a good man to add to.

A relationship with Dash Riprock is subservient to the priority that you are focused. Yeah, you need a vision more than you need a tripod. You need something great to live and die for first. You need to hear from God before you fuse to a fellow. If not, you’ll be a gullible Etch-A-Sketch from some scribbling monkey.

Look ladies, if you enter into a relationship rudderless, like a needy parasite, you will be come the slave of whatever host you hitched yourself to. You’ll find yourself doing things . . . changing things . . . believing things . . . compromising things . . . and getting involved in crap you wouldn’t even think of doing just because you neeeeeeeeeeed him.

Girls get freaky when they don’t have much going on in life. They try to over please, which is cool for two to three weeks for most guys, but then it gets a little nerve gratingly old. Yes, the desire to please motivated from need can get whacked. It goes something like this: Girl -“Do you like my hair? The guy pauses because he’s watching a Bud Lite commercial. The co-dependant girl takes his pause as disapproval and spouts, “What—you don’t like my hair? Is it my bangs? It’s my bangs, isn’t it? ‘Cause I’ll cut ‘em. If you want me to, I’ll cut my bangs. I swear to God, I’ll cut ‘em. Don’t leave me! Arggh!”

Honeys, please, please, don’t queue up to any person needing them to make you whole. Holy cow, señorita. Looking to most guys nowadays for fulfillment, as one comedian said, is like looking to Michael Jackson for psychoanalysis. You’ve got to go to the desert. Get focused. You should have (again!) so much going on that if your guy dumps you like a chunk of concrete or if some dude doesn’t like you it shouldn’t cause a major hiccup in your life. Why? Well, you have a nation to save, a dragon to slay, a mountain to conquer, a mission to attend to and it’s that man’s loss, not yours.

Listen, if a guy leaves you, or is not attracted to you, that shouldn’t derail your existence. That shouldn’t throw you into a neurotic never ending introspective trip that leaves you depressed, jonesing on Bridget Jones, developing raccoon eyes from lack of sleep, or singing “I cant live if living is without you” while you gorge yourself on aerosol whipped cream.

Get a life (one more time) first, and you’ll get a worthy man.

To be continued . . .

* Check out Doug’s new video at www.Clashradio.com. This week’s video is “We Love Pepsi, They Love Death”. In addition, the one and only Skunk Boy sings his version of John Lennon’s song, “Imagine”.

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About The Author
Doug Giles’ new book “If You're Going Through Hell, Keep Going!" is now available. Ann Coulter says "Doug Giles is a substantive and funny tour de force for traditional values.” Doug’s talk show and video blog can be seen and heard at www.ClashRadio.com.
 
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Duchess of Austin
Actually, I think that's almost Giles's point--too many women doing things for understandable, but really dumb, reasons. You just said you know from experience that they are, in fact, pretty dumb reasons--being a bride is all well and good, but wanting to dress up and be queen for a day isn't a good reason to enter into matrimony, and it's bound to end badly. Hence, articles saying, "Hey, girls... *BAD* idea. *REALLY* bad."

You guys are too hard on poor Britney.
Britney Spears did nothing that millions of girls her age don't do at some point. She wanted to get MARRIED.

Think about it....she didn't have what anybody here would call a "normal" childhood, she probably missed all those little milestones, i.e., homecoming queen, the senior prom, etc., because she was on a stage somewhere, earning a living at 16 or 17. Heck, she started at 9 years of age, on that old talent show that Ed McMahon hosted, StarSearch...as did her colleague, Christina Aguilara.

The reason I know what Britney did, is because I did it, too. I reached a certain age, as a young woman, and as I looked around me, all my friends were getting married, so I had to also. Soooo, I collared the first man I could find and made him marry me. Turns out he was (of course) the wrong man, but that didn't matter at the time because all I wanted to be was a bride. I didn't necessarily want the marriage....

I think Brit wanted to be a bride, and she wanted to be a mother, and since she's filthy rich, she doesn't have to worry about support. IMO, Fed-EX is nothing but a sperm donor, and she knew that, deep down, the marriage wouldn't work out....
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