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Saturday, July 30, 2005
Doug Giles :: Townhall.com Columnist
Habit Six: Hang Out with Morons
by Doug Giles
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You can find the feckless marital infidels, now, almost anywhere to help you destroy your nuptials nowadays.  Simply, look next door… at work … in the gym… at a bar… or even maybe a malicious meddling in-law or maybe a long lost creepy relative.  Just look around, there are plenty of people to pummel your good thing into a very bad deal and all you have to do is chill with them, buy ‘em a beer, put them on speed dial and start spending time with them.

2. Singles.  If you want to ensure disaster in your life, then one of the greatest ways to do so is to marry the wrong person.  Guys, if you want massive hell in your life don’t marry a woman of character, strength and virtue but instead marry a chick just because of her hair color, bra size and leg length.  Yes, make certain that TNA is the only thing her DNA has going for her.  Make physicality the thing that drives you to the altar.  In addition, do not get to know her very well and make the engagement super short, don’t listen to your parents or friends tell you she’s a skank, make sure she’s not the same religion as you, make sure her mother’s ugly and is a busy body, make sure your lady is materialistic and has huge notions of entitlement, and make certain that she has so many personalities that they could form their own bowling team.  Ditto girls.

The bottom line is this: When you feel the temptation to leave losers in the dust, to judge them, to move jobs (or cities) to get away from them, to delete their cell number, and to not answer their calls or their text messages you must realize that you are severing a powerful source and force for failure, so … stop that immediately or success will creep up on you. Yes, you might begin to gravitate towards the great … y’know … some positive poisonous people who’ll push you to excel.

Therefore, if you’re serious about having a sad subsistence it is important that you look for people who are decisively greedy, hateful, envious, contentious, deceptive, malicious gossip and are negative.  Hunt for folks who are backstabbers, haters of good, insolent, proud, boastful and kids, who walk around holding their crotch.  Yeah, try find those who are forever inventing new ways of screwing their lives up, while being disobedient to their parents, and disrespectful to our nation.  Find the the miserables who treat their genitals like an amusement park, who lack understanding, who break their promises, and are heartless and unforgiving.  It is them, my friend, who can help you; both directly and by osmosis, screw your life up in a beautiful way almost irretrievable way. 

Habit Se7en to follow…

* Logon to www.ClashRadio.com to hear Doug’s interview with Ben Shapiro, author of the book Porn Generation: How Social Liberalism is Corrupting Our Future.

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About The Author
Doug Giles’ new book “If You're Going Through Hell, Keep Going!" is now available. Ann Coulter says "Doug Giles is a substantive and funny tour de force for traditional values.” Doug’s talk show and video blog can be seen and heard at www.ClashRadio.com.
 
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