Some people drink wine as a beverage and don’t care that it’s a beverage of conversation in some quarters.

The culture that revolves around knowing wine very well is one that can be populated by snobs who are prepared, at the drop of a cliche, to say the right thing.

I have been accused of this, and I know that anyone can play the game. You don’t have to know much about wine if you know how to act.

Becoming a snob is easier than you might think. Just learn the following rules and follow them in public.

-- When asked what your favorite wines are, always say something like, “France is the historic birthplace of great vin.”

-- If asked your opinion of Burgundy, say you drink nothing but Grand Cru or Premier Cru, but “they can be so erratic.”

-- Always take price tags off bottles that cost less than $20. And always leave the price tags on when serving expensive wines.

-- If someone asks your favorite vintages, chuckle and say that 1961 or 1945 Bordeaux would be most people’s choices, “but I have a sentimental attachment to the ’53s.”

-- You’re in an Italian restaurant and someone suggests a chianti to go with the pasta. Look disdainfully at the wine list and snort, “Pathetic. No 1978 Barolos.”

The best place to exhibit snobbism is at a snooty restaurant, preferably one with a sommelier.

-- When handed the wine list, no matter how extensive it is, even if it is 50 pages, always ask the sommelier, “Do you have a captain’s list?” Very few restaurants have such a “limited selection” list any more, but it indicates your willingness to consider really expensive wines.

-- You order a chardonnay; all the glasses are poured, and the server asks if you would like it in an ice bucket. Say, “No, thanks, it can go on the table. We don’t like chardonnay popsicles.”

-- After ordering a bowl of soup, ask if the restaurant has any dry sherry to serve alongside it. Few restaurants do, but it is certainly a nice, snobbish touch to ask. Continued...