It seems that I've known June is "wedding month" since I was a little girl. And, in fact, a bit of research reveals that the June wedding tradition goes back as far as the Romans.

As I think of all the soon-to-be married couples who ask me for tips on how best to manage their soon-to-be joint finances, I wonder how far back couples started having traditional money problems - those little issues that soon can turn into a big headache and an even bigger heartache.

It's interesting that no matter how differently we define our modern relationships, both within and outside of marriage, things like handling wealth take on the same importance generation after generation. So whether you (or a family member) are a traditionalist planning to tie the knot this June or are charting your own course with the one you love, some good old-fashioned financial advice now can help make your ongoing relationship more smoother down the road.

GETTING TO KNOW EACH OTHER FINANCIALLY

The adage "opposites attract" can apply to money attitudes as much as anything else. So it's important to start with a frank discussion about your approach to money. How different are you? Is one person a saver and the other a spender? How do you handle credit and debt? How about the issue of control? What are your individual financial goals?

Answering these questions upfront will lay the foundation for greater mutual understanding. When it comes to money, you're not only dealing with numbers, you're dealing with feelings.

Then once you've discussed your feelings, get practical. Make sure you know everything you should about each other's finances, including assets, income, investments, money history, debts and business dealings. How closely you merge your financial lives is up to you, but to make a smooth financial marriage you have to be as completely honest and open about your money as you are about everything else.

PUTTING A PLAN IN PLACE

From handling daily financial obligations to planning and saving for a home, children and retirement, the more clearly you state your desires and the more precise you are about roles and responsibilities, the smoother your financial relationship will be. While you may have shared certain expenses in the past, as you look to your future the bigger issues of saving and investing assume greater significance. Developing a plan will help you come to some agreements as well as sticking to your goals.

Here are some important things to consider:

- Splitting up financial responsibilities: Decide how you'll handle expenses - which ones you'll share (mortgage, utilities and groceries) and those you'll keep separate (clothes, personal entertainment, etc.). If you both work and one of you makes more money than the other, agree on what percentage of your individual incomes you'll contribute to the common pool that makes it fair to each of you. Then once you've determined where the money is coming from, agree on who will be responsible for the actual bill paying.

Where you keep your money and how you keep track of expenses is another point to discuss. Some couples prefer to pool everything in a joint account - what's mine is yours and what's yours is mine. But for others, keeping separate accounts for personal expenses and a joint account for shared expenses makes for greater harmony. There are no right or wrong solutions here, just so you both agree and have equal autonomy.

- Saving: This is an incredibly important issue because it affects not only what you do today but also your financial future. What percentage of your income will you agree to save each year? How will you divide your savings between short-term goals like a vacation and long-term goals like retirement?

You can't afford to ignore this issue because the sooner you start, the more time you have on your side and the less you may have to save in total each year. For instance, if you start saving in your 20s, you might get by with putting aside 10 percent of your income for the rest of your working life. Start in your mid-30s and you need to consider saving 15 percent to 20 percent of your income. And it goes up from there.

- Investing: Once you have some savings, you'll want to consider how to invest it. In many couples, one person takes the lead investing in a joint brokerage account. This is what my husband Gary and I do. In our situation, I do the investing; however, I always consult with him before making a major decision. If one prefers to have more financial independence, consider having separate investing accounts. Together or separate, the goal is to put your money to work and help it grow in a way that works best for both of you.

WHAT ABOUT A PRENUPTIAL AGREEMENT?

A prenuptial agreement certainly doesn't sound romantic, but in the long run, it might just help keep the romance alive. Usually we think of prenuptial agreements as something only for the rich or famous. But in certain circumstances, having your financial arrangement written out clearly can make sense.

Here are some instances where even the "average" couple might consider a prenuptial:

- One of you is coming into the marriage with significantly more money or property than the other. Continued...