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Friday, August 10, 2007
How to Mess Up a Mormon
Posted by: Matt Lewis at 2:48 PM
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

So the general consensus around our office today is that Mitt Romney is slightly too perfect for his own good (in sort of a Ken doll way).

... You know how nobody wants it to look like they just got a haircut? ... Or how when you get a new pair of tennis shoes, you want them to look new -- but not too new (you don't want them to be spotless)?

Well, that's how we see Mitt Romney. He needs just the slightest bit of an edge to give him some "street cred." Right now, he's like a pair of jeans that is ironed... How do we toughen-up his image?

So I thought that a slow Friday afternoon would be a good time to give you, the readers, a chance to suggest how Romney might tweak his image.

Ideas so far have included closing down a bar in Ames (which I don't think he can do), to getting in a fist fight, to smoking cigars. We also think that having some cool celebrities (like Clint Eastwood) endorse him might help.

So if you were advising him on his image, what would you recommend?





View in ascending order View in descending order
RASHUM writes: Friday, August, 10, 2007 3:03 PM
Sports
Play a game of flag football!

Sports are great - just not wind surfing :)
shrinkgovernment writes: Friday, August, 10, 2007 3:04 PM
Perhaps he could become a ninja?
Or a pirate? Or a PINJA?!
Ellen Waldstein writes: Friday, August, 10, 2007 3:04 PM
Are you sure?
Are you freaks on the Right sure you want to disparage Mitt? He really is the only hope the GOP has of beating Hillary and Obama.

You might want to stock up on Donny and Marie CDs now.
John Hanlon writes: Friday, August, 10, 2007 3:05 PM
Typical...
First, you spell "Doogie Howser" wrong and now you go after Mitt Romney for being too perfect...

Tom writes: Friday, August, 10, 2007 3:09 PM
Get out of the Race
Let the real conservatives who do not need to manufacture street cred, run for the nomination. It is time for the "Flipper" to go!
terpfan79 writes: Friday, August, 10, 2007 3:12 PM
How about a...
missionary ride with leather bomber jacket and harley instead of white button down shirts and Schwinns?

Eichendorff writes: Friday, August, 10, 2007 3:15 PM
Romney is who he is.
Do you want him to try and fake it just because you aren't quite comfortable with his "perfection"?

I suspect he has said the odd "damn" or "hell" in his life, but for crying out loud it might just be a refreshing change to have a politician who doesn't wallow in corruption.

Bill Clinton could have been a great president if he wasn't such a scumbag. Finally, we have the chance for a president who, being as intelligent as they come, also lives a moral and upstanding life. Let's embrace it.
Bluey writes: Friday, August, 10, 2007 3:15 PM
Do an interview with Soren Dayton
The eyeon08.com blogger has been a thorn in Romney's side for months. Confront the criticism head on. Act more like he did in that interview with Jan Mickelson.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-G9hydflwEQ
Jeff H writes: Friday, August, 10, 2007 3:23 PM
Here's a sure-fire way...
...for Romney to toughen up his image and give him some street cred with a large segment of the American voting populace.

Have him dress up in full SWAT uniform, go to a shooting range, and take shots at a John Kerry target.
Trent writes: Friday, August, 10, 2007 3:28 PM
I think Mitt should...
Try drinking his lemonade from a *dirty* glass.

-Trentamj
Eichendorff writes: Friday, August, 10, 2007 3:30 PM
The missionary ride...
...on a Harley-Davidson would get a pretty good laugh.
murphy writes: Friday, August, 10, 2007 3:38 PM
It's a good sign...
...when the opposition just sits around flubbering about how Romney is TOO good.

Maybe he should learn how to stutter, trim down the vocabulary, and do a few interviews with bed-head. That might satisfy the Matt Lewis et al thirst for mediocrity.
MichaelA writes: Friday, August, 10, 2007 3:54 PM
---
Harley-Davidson, I love that one. I can envision him going all over S.C. on his bike. LOL!

Nah, he should go to his old playbook when he ran for Governor in 2002. Work on contruction teams, pave roads, take out trash, repair cars, all of that fun stuff he did.

I would love it if he got on a Garbage truck which picked up trash from the U.S. Capitol.
BorderBill writes: Friday, August, 10, 2007 3:57 PM
Toughen up his image
By showing him playing sports with his three boys.

Kerry tried that sort of stuff in 2004 with Edwards and it backfired because Kerry looked unnatural playing sports.

If Mitt Romney is accostumed to playing sports with his three boys, show them doing it. Have Mitt's wife sneak around with a camera for unscripted moments of them playing sports together (If they do that sort of thing). The only thing they might get is them racing around a track, but that is still something.

Whatever it is, it shouldn't be faked. If Mitt Romney doesn't play football with his boys, don't do it! If he doesn't cut down trees in his backyard with a chainsaw like Bush does, don't do it!

Get those things on camera that are truely authentic Mitt Romney.

It doesn't have to be something that shows he's not perfect. It just needs to be stuff that shows he's a regular guy like the rest of us. So far our only image of him is as super dad and super business man. We need to know that he's also an average guy and so we need to see him doing average things.

But for pete's sake, make sure it's authentic. The last thing we need is a poser running for office.
Matt Lewis writes: Friday, August, 10, 2007 3:59 PM
Maybe a
goatee?
Keith writes: Friday, August, 10, 2007 4:00 PM
It is a slow day
I agree with Eichendorff when he said we should embrace Mitt because "it might just be a refreshing change to have a politician who doesn't wallow in corruption." Squeaky clean? doubt it, but better that what the left has fielded (remember that Hillary has already been there: read Amanda Carpenter's book!!!)
Richbert88 writes: Friday, August, 10, 2007 4:01 PM
Just wait.
The smear merchants will attempt to tarnish him and his natural intelligence and moxy will come through, proving he's not really Ward Cleaver.
John Hanlon writes: Friday, August, 10, 2007 4:03 PM
Maybe...
Maybe he could spell "Doogie Howser" as "Doogie Houser" as Matt Lewis did.

I think that shows that you are not perfect.
Eichendorff writes: Friday, August, 10, 2007 4:37 PM
Yankee
I can only suspect you don't want your comment to be taken seriously.
soothsayer writes: Friday, August, 10, 2007 4:42 PM
How about return this money?
No mention anywhere in townhall that one of Romney's major fundraisers was indicted for fraud by a federal grand jury today.

Will Mitt return the bucks? Ha!
none none writes: Friday, August, 10, 2007 4:45 PM
Romney's not a regular guy
and I don't want a regular guy to be my president. I thought we were looking for a top notch person to be the leader of the free world.

Apparently there is a lot of resentment of him by those who are less than secure in their own skin. I've noticed that it is the childish men on TH who are constantly tearing him down with no justification. (And the libs.)

Just goes to show Romney is a force. I think he's going to end up with the nomination and can win against Hillary.
PJPO'K, Sr. writes: Friday, August, 10, 2007 4:48 PM
Romney's just fine
I’m enjoying the facetious comments but I whole heartedly agree that the authentic Romney is just fine. – Who can forget Kerry’s attempts to look like a “regular guy”?
- staged reenactment in Vietnam with the Marine Corp camo boonie hat
- trying to order at Wendy’s on a campaign stop
- duck hunting outing replete with his crisp L.L.Bean outfit
- obvious Botox treatment with orange ‘man-tan’ hue in one of the debates
- neatly rolled up sleeves and his Givenchy tie ever so slightly loosened
- etc
none none writes: Friday, August, 10, 2007 5:36 PM
MikeLep
Romney's not a social moderate. He has only has one real issue where he was not straight conservative - abortion. He fixed that. So you'll be disappointed if you're expecting a moderate. He can and will draw those who are on the fence about Mormonism. He already has to a large degree. The rest will come as more people get to know him. Conseratives really have no other option what with Guilliani or the "Tennessee Stud" with no guts.

Romney is by far the most competent candidate on either side. He has a very good chance of proving you wrong. We'll soon see.
sceptic writes: Friday, August, 10, 2007 5:55 PM
romney and mccain can forget it
Romney is old party, old money republican. I for one am tired of being strung along. We've elected conservatives who promised to accomplish things for us, only for many to be sidelined by the influence of the old guard. They humor us to get our votes, then betray us. Another Bush or Romney need not apply. I feel good when I know my own congressman, or state rep, are true conservatives that I do not have to send your desperate emails to to harrass. They know what the people want and care. They know where their loyalty lies.
As for McCain, he wants to act like he is being persecuted for supporting the president. Lots of conservatives have supported the Iraq policy and are not being rejected. Big M has betrayed us so many times, we wouldnt elect him to be the proverbial dog catcher, unless of course, the dogs promised to bite him. I do not want to support someone pro-choice or overly pro-immigrant, but I still like Guiliani. I believe we can trust him. Far better for us to get someone who will bargain to get our vote, knowing he has to deliver to maintain our support, than to go with someone who thinks he's too good for us, who can play us and then betray us. Maybe Tammany Hall had its strengths, and that was knowing you had to deliver to keep power.
sceptic writes: Friday, August, 10, 2007 6:03 PM
Huckabee for VP
And in payment for supporting a moderate, thus proving we are not one issue voters, we ought to get someone who does represent our issues as VP. Not only does that help encourage us to get out the vote, it gives us someone in the Senate who can work to get some of these issues passed.
fuzzy writes: Friday, August, 10, 2007 6:05 PM
forget him...
...and go with Duncan Hunter
BG writes: Friday, August, 10, 2007 6:13 PM
Self
Mitt needs to be himself. The biggest knock on him is that he is plastic or not real. The GOP will get used to the real Mitt it is just a matter of exposure. Kennedy was real and still got support. Most of the plastic charges are coming from other candidates who can't be Mitt.

If all else fails, attack a candidates strength and try to make it a weakness. Mitt should attack Rudy on security (amnesty city) and Fred on being both a "good ole boy" at the same time he is a high powered Washington insider lobbyist. Fred can't have it both ways, Gucci shoes with overalls.

I will take someone who who is real (successful).
Arby writes: Friday, August, 10, 2007 7:17 PM
Hey, Matt
You need more work to do. Is this addition to your blog the only thing you could think of?

Whether you like the guy or not, he conducts himself professionally, he looks and acts the part, and he campaigns and works tirelessly.

Clearly, Matt, you need to come up with a topic that has meat. This one doesn't.
Ex-tex writes: Friday, August, 10, 2007 8:01 PM
It is no easy task to mess up a Ken Doll
It pretty much requires permanent markers or extreme heat. I know from personal experience.

'Course you can always pull the limbs off.
none none writes: Friday, August, 10, 2007 8:25 PM
Ex-Tex
Isn't it an interesting contrast - Romney some are trying to dumb down because he is apparently too perfect, and Fred some are trying to prop up because he is in reality all hat and no cattle.
BetsyRossUSA writes: Saturday, August, 11, 2007 1:16 AM
Mitt Romney
I don't think he should do a thing. Remember,it didn't work for John Kerry, trying to be something he wasn't?
He's not my first choice so far, but from a middle aged woman's view, he is eye candy just the way he is!! LOL
Old Whig writes: Saturday, August, 11, 2007 1:37 AM
How about...
...maybe hitting a radio talk show host over the head with a Book of Mormon?

I would pay to see that.
Old Whig writes: Saturday, August, 11, 2007 1:41 AM
Rae
Hello? What are you talking about?

Everything the unhallowed Left and the overzealous Right has tried to stick on Mitt has failed. First the porn thing, then the dog thing, now the chickenhawk thing.

The only "thing" that will stop Mitt from running is his own withdrawal from the race.
Daniel writes: Saturday, August, 11, 2007 2:43 AM
Here's the plan:
He should probably have an affair and divorce his wife (a few times), endorse abortion and gay rights, and alienate his sons.
one hot minute writes: Saturday, August, 11, 2007 1:05 PM
Matt Lewis is...Quentin Tarantino !
Imagine for a moment, that, instead of writing about Mitt Romney, Matt Lewis were discussing a candidate who happens to be Jewish.
Would Matt actually write the headline, "How to Mess up a Jew" ?
Or what if Matt were discussing a candidate who is an Evangelical.
Would Matt write a headline that says, "How to Mess up an Evangelical" ?

If Matt wants to talk about scuffing up shoes, dressing Romney up in one of Marlon Brando's leather motorcycle jackets, or messing up the Governor's hair, then go ahead and write the headline in that context.
But "messing up a MORMON" sure is a peculiar way of expressing that.
After all, what does Romney's theology have to do with having a 'too perfect' haircut ?

If someone at Daily Kos wrote a headline to a blog post which said they want to "Mess up Matt Lewis," I don't think Matt would interpret that to mean they just want to step on his brand new white tennis shoes.

When somebody talks about "messing someone up," most people interpret that to mean 'roughing someone up,' or sicking Tony Soprano on a guy.
Obviously, I don't think Matt has devious plans to recruit his Wednesday nite Bible study group to jump Mitt Romney with baseball bats and tire irons so they can "mess him up."
But as careful as Matt often is in his selection of words, I just find it interesting that Matt doesn't like Romney's perfect hair, so he 'mentions' Romney's...theology !

Ironically, for months, Matt Lewis has whined about how Romney and Giuliani aren't perfect enough in their GOP credentials.
Now Matt is resentful of Romney---for being TOO perfect !

Matt Lewis may have been the edgiest guy in his quaint hometown of Frederick, Maryland where many of the homes date back to the 18th century.
Unfortunately, Matt's attitude toward people who subscribe to a different theology than he does dates back to the 18th century as well.
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